tales of my world!

2007-03-26T14:04:00.000Z

Thanks for all the encouragement that everyone gave me for passing my driving test.

I managed to pass thankfully a week ago to nearly this very minute. It's very strange to look back and say that a week ago i was in despair at the thought that the test was just about upon me. Now i can say "what was i worrying about." However as always i was unable to keep the negative thoughts completely at bay as i had some quite hilariously annoying circumstances to deal with. so here are a few:

It had been snowing in Buxton where i was taking the test

i was worrying as normal

Which led to me convincing my self i had food poisoning

Couldn't stand my driving instructor

rain, hail n snow to start the test

the five way middle o town traffic lights weren't working

So with this all happening just for me a lot of doubt barged its way into my mind. By the end i'd convinced myself that i must have failed, with all the pencil scratching he was doin next to me. any how i didn't n it's a big load off my mind.

Driving on your own for the first time is a little weird. All of a sudden i realized that i'm responsible for the car i'm driving and everyone else's that i scrape past as well. It's all a little lonely as well, especially with no radio. I've decided that it'll be the time that sing to myself, just to keep myself company.

Any how thanx again for all the encouragement on my last post.

Cheers

2007-02-27T13:59:00.000Z

It has been aaaages since my last post, so i apologise for that. As it's my first post in bout a month (sorry Purkul) i've completely lost the flow of what i've been talking about. The great thing that has happened since my last blog, is that there's loads of new bloggers. More interesting people that i can start comment on.

As far as me being up to anything, i haven't. A viral infection(my diagnosis) knocked me flat on my face at the beginning of the month(great start to the year). So i'm still recovering and trying to get my strength back. I haven't been quite so ill for a long time. Anyway that's the bad part.

The good things so far is that i'm going for my driving test soon, n that'll be another weight off my shoulders. I've also decided to start weight training again(first time in two years). The aim is to get to twelve stone in twelve weeks by gaining around 2kg a week. There's a long way to go yet, but progress is being made. I've got a consultation with a weight training guy at the end of the week, he may well asses my current body state, eating habits n general life stile and help me reach my goals.

At the moment i'm really optimistic about the future, n real happy to vent some stress on the weights at the end of the day.

2007-01-15T11:43:00.000Z

Today was the day that my bike got sold and officially left the soil that its' stood on for the last 2-3 years. A little bit sad, but then on the other hand getting rid of it in the first place meant a new start and letting go of a dream that was never going to happen. So i've decided to up-load some photos to relive those great memories and what i'll be missing most, from the sport. I hope u like the photos!

thought i'd end the way i started riding (in ball breaking agony)

Now that i've taken up mountain biking through woods and down steps i get to keep an element of motocross, without the expense or pressure from myself. The exercise does me good as well and goes towards helping my general mental health for the week.

As this is only the second post in this new year i'd better say that i still have some optimism left in me, not all of it has drained away quite yet.

2007-01-01T02:07:00.000Z

Welcome to the New Year everyone!

I'm toasting the new year in with a Prawn cocktail in one hand and a bottle of wine in the other. Also keeping up the tradition of watching Jools Hollands' Hootenanny every year.

I hope your all having fun in the New Year!

2006-12-25T22:27:00.000Z

Merry Christmas

It's probably a little late for a Xmas blog in Britain but anyone in America and that way it might just about be fit for. Anyway Merry Christmas to everyone.

Ok day for me, i have just been relaxing all day(all you can do after Xmas dinner) and watching movies. Have picked up the bass for the first time in a while, that put a big smile on my brothers' face as we've been as loud as we could be for about 2 hours.

The food has been great as always and on time which was nice. Am now looking forward to cycling it all off again at the end of the week. The snow also didn't happen like I'd hoped even though it's cold enough for it. Other than no snow it's been an ok day.

As far as Christmas more so than new year's means to me. It's a time to look back and see how much i've achieved over the year. Not much. The real important achievement is the state of mind that i can now appreciate as healthier and happier one. You can't achieve this on your own. So i'd like to say thanks to everyone who's helped me get this far, i had a lot of doubt that i could ever have felt happy after the last couple of years.

Thanks everyone, and i big Xmas cheer from me!

2006-12-18T12:59:00.000Z

I had a go at some mountain biking yesterday, it went great and was lots of fun. Me and nick(brother) went riding in the woods near home trying to find some good downhills to race each other on. When i started going down the first hill it was really muddy and when i almost hit a tree at the bottom i started to think that it was a mistake. I was soon reassured though when we saw something incredibly beautiful. We came out of the first wood into a field, struggled across to the end and i realised that my gloves were missing. It started raining and we turned round to go get them when a rainbow formed just in front of us. Their we were the sun in the field, the shadows of us sitting on bikes and the rainbow over our heads. The end of the rainbow was in the same field as us. I've never seen anything quite as inspiring in my life.

After that moment it was time literally for some down to earth moments for me, as in the next wood a fell off twice in the space of 2 minutes. Firstly down a muddy bank and then into a small stream where i got drenched all down one side. We had lots of fun getting real mudded up racing one-another through the woods almost hitting trees and riding down sets of steps. It was brilliant, the only tuff part was peddling through mud and pushing the bike up the banks on the way home after four hours of riding. It gets you fit!

When we made it home though we had a nice big Sunday dinner waiting for us, which made us think that this is what Sunday is all about.

2006-12-15T14:07:00.000Z

Hitting the nineteenth and putting another year away in the bag. Can't quite believe it, especially when i end up looking back on old photos of when i was just one. Lots has changed but then some things haven't, like my daft grin and that me, brother and sister are still together and best friends as always.

As a treat i thought i'd buy myself a mountain bike to get fit on and get lots of excitement flying through woods and over jumps. It's got to be my best idea as far as keeping my moral high. I'm really excited about it and constantly looking on the Internet to see all the things i can try. Speaking of all the things i can try, yesterday Emma brought up the idea of doing the coast to coast cycle which sounds just brilliant. So far i've a fire lit under me anticipating of all the exciting stuff i'm gonna get up to next year. Instead of getting blind drunk on new years, this year i'll be quietly looking forward to the new year.

Here's the bike. It looks great for jumping.

Thanks for the birthday card Emma E, Mandy and Emma B it made me have a sweet chuckle to my self this morning.
Also thanks to Emma b for the diary. Now i can start writing down some of the things i want to try next year.

Excellent!

2006-12-10T17:37:00.000Z

Trying to get in the Christmas spirit seems to be getting harder and harder each year. It certainly doesn't seem to be as easy as the movies make it look. Our house is completely dormant so far as Christmas lights and spirit go, if it wasn't cold and dark you wouldn't think it was anywhere near Xmas. Even with the lights up everywhere it just doesn't feel the same, but i gather that's just getting older. However just because i'm not in the Christmas spirit i'm gonna put all the lights up anyway just to annoy the old man and bro. I do think however that if only it would snow before instead of after Christmas i might feel better. As usual though it will snow in march and then i'll say "It feels like Xmas" n someone else will say, "you've got another nine months to wait till then." So really i could do with finding a way now in order to get me feeling great for Christmas day. Who knows though maybe the whisky will do it!

2006-11-30T15:49:00.000Z

Ok here's the first blog for a while since i've been suffering from blogstipation(writers block). So thats gonna be the subject of this one.
Since i started blogging i've been struggling with what to put. At the start i planned on doing two aweek then it ended up being one, now it's about zero turnout. So far the blogs i've written about have been stuff that i thought people might be intersted in reading, rather than just letting it flow. Also at the last steering group meeting it was also brought up about how the small things tend to spark more enthusiasm in the blogging world, so i'm revising how to go on from here and hopefully get rid of the blogstipation to carry on blogging till my little hearts content.
I'd like to ask for advice and what anyone else does to get through it?

PS- thank nat for blogstipation tis good

2006-11-11T14:52:00.000Z

I've gotta say that the food for thought conference was really eye opening and a great success.
I think that for me atleast the conference did it's job, making me stand back and look at my poor diet and ways to change it to benefit me in the future (infact i'm eating an apple instead of chocolate right now).
All the speakers were really good (especially Patrick Holford) and did such a great job to get over the impact of diet on mental health. I walked away from there realizing just how important a good diet is, which shows that it made me think carefully.
Well here's an insight into the worst problems with my current diet.

Often skip breakfast
breakfast consists of cupa & toast
i eat big meals & snack on chocolate inbetween
hardly ever eat fruit
also eat big supper before bed

So that's just some of the really bad habits i'm hoping to shake off in the next few months as i implement i healthier diet.

I've also got myself something else to occupy my time. That is playing a bass guitar and putting songs together with my brother. There's just so much fun to be had turning up the bass full & blasting out some music, plus i've almost finished my first song timing an all.

So yep everythings good.

2006-11-04T00:21:00.000Z

Well yesterday was all about letting go!Making way for progress. This all happening on a birthday that's got a big number involved.

The letting go came on the part of both me and my brother, so that we could make big steps in our lives to move forward.
My brothers' big moment came when early yesterday he decided to go for the full skin head look. Yep he shaved it all off. Doesn't sound like much, until you are to realize how much the prospect of loosing his hair has tormented him for years. Deciding to let things be & to brave whatever comments come his way in the future, the long hair came right off, n none spared. From my point of view, of someone who's seen him in times of crisis it is an incredibly BRAVE! surge forward. To be so conscious of something for so long and worry about it until life is in the grip of anxiety is a terrible thing. What an amazing step forward though. I hope that in the near future he'll come to realize this.

For me, well i let go of an old dream. A fun hobby that turned into an obsession. As of yesterday (it's past 12 now) my motocross bike is on eBay and up for sale to the highest bidder. It marks the end of dreaming and the end of the bitterness that i left the racing world with. I can't say that i'll never think about racing & the what ifs, but in time i'll let go and stop hanging on to dream that i won't ever reach.

The final part of this post is that this all happened on my grannies 89th Birthday. To me the 89 is a big number, but she seems happy as usual
turning every passing minute into fun and happiness. She is the most inspirational person in my life & seeing her today made everything seem great!

This post is far from a negative one. It signifies change and in turn sparks optimism at the highest levels!

2006-10-30T03:44:00.000Z

Well i've had a pretty typical weekend looking after my niece for most of it. Actually i think i was just around at the same time and it feels like hard work even when i'm not looking after her. She's really daft some times with bags of energy which is the best time to look after her.
We took her to a Halloween party on friday n she had a great time, so that made everyone else happy.

Anyway as this is my first blogg i'm going to find out what happens next, the ambitious more interesting posts will come later.